zen and the art of newborn nights

Friday, November 04, 2005

zen and the art of newborn nights Current mood: tired The last couple nights have been a little better. It's not necessarily because Griff is waking less- it's more because I have been more relaxed and accepting of the need for me to wake at night. Somehow, by remembering to go with the flow rather than resisting when Griff needs me at night I actually end up feeling more rested come morning. This is often easier said than done- especially when I've just snuggled into a very comfortable position when Griff starts to fuss. It can be very hard indeed to promptly give up that comfort with a light heart, and devote myself to meeting his needs. (Particularly if that means getting OUT of bed to change his diaper!!) More often than I'd like to admit, I find myself grumbling silently (or not-so-silently!) while I try in vain to soothe poor Griff with a pacifier. It's hard not to let myself do that, but trying to accept the situation is a good exercise in cultivating inner peace regardless of what might be going on in that moment. A lot of parenting can be an exercise in cultivating inner peace- remembering to slow down, accept the situation as it is and do the best we can do with that moment as it exists- and remembering not to waste energy being frustrated if a situation is not what we would have liked it to be. It's good to try and guide the present in a positive direction (so that future moments are positive), but it's a waste of energy to wish that past or present moments are/were anything other than what they are/were. (There's an awkward sentence. . .) Anyway I realized that this is a lot of the reason that I stay (relatively) sane- I try my best to go with the flow, do the best I can with the present I have, and not waste time worrying about anything that I can't change. I guess it's a good plan for anyone, but I find it's particularly important at 3:00 in the morning when I'd rather be asleep. ;) deep breath- in. . . . . . . . . . . . out. . . . . . . . . . . OK now go face your evening! :)