I have been pondering something, and would really love to get some feedback from all of you. This has the potential to reawaken some warm fuzzy feelings in all participants. :) Here's my question:
What does your spouse or significant other do (or did, as the case may be) that replenishes your soul, and shows you that you are loved?
I'm looking for any thoughtful answer to that question, though the spirit of the inquiry leans toward those small things that happen often and truly keep us going. Tiny treasures of actions that mean more than all the words in the world.
Thank you so much for thinking on this, and responding.
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Cynicism
2 hours ago
5 comments:
Hmm...
He calls me when he's at work (he's not supposed to) and laughs because he can tell I'm smiling and he's surprised and delighted me.
And he wistfully, mournfully tells me he wishes he was here when I'm sick or crazy-busy so he could help with the Evil Genius.
And...perhaps weirdly, but awfully importantly (to me) - he is himself, utterly...he's not afraid to let me hear his anger and frustration when a day goes bad,and he gives me his hurt, his happiness, his sorrow and his silliness, freely and without asking anything in return.
Perhaps one day I'll have something less...ephemeral...but since we're long distance for the nonce (and I have to pack my lunch for work), this'll have to do!
Shade and Sweetwater,
K (who thinks this is a lovely question!)
I'm like Sarah (what she said on FB in response to this) - its more about what he doesn't do.
Also, the amount of his available time that he spends with the girls shows our family love all around.
He also tucks me into bed every night if he stays up later than me - love that.
And you? What is your response Kit?
Ok, here's a very personal one...
I was seriously depressed for many years - I mean, really in a terrible hole where I could absolutely not be reached. R began to wake me with a cup of tea in the morning - as much to make sure I actually got up, I suspect. It was such a small, intimate act, a hopeful thing. He just wanted to make the start of the day better for me. Somehow, just by the way he did it, it really got across how much he cared.
Fast forward by five years or so, and he still makes me a cup of tea in bed if he has the time. He never stopped doing it, and it never stopped feeling like a deep affirmation of love. Just a simple thing.
I know I'm more than a bit behind the ball in answering this one but I think I may need to do it, even if only for myself.
R does all of those repetitive things that tend to drive me bonkers after a couple iterations: vacuum, take out the trash, pick up the kids' toys (yet again), get Noodle ready for school, packing and taking his own dinner to work... These are all things that have, in the past, belonged to the "women's work" category and I am ever so grateful that our marriage has worked the way it has. I feel as though I owe him a debt of gratitude many days when the most I can offer him in return is a promise to keep the kids safe until he returns and a heartfelt parting kiss. That's another little thing he rarely misses, even when he's short on time or we've been in a heated discussion just prior to his departure.
The little things do matter - and I can only hope to emulate R as time continues to pass so that he doesn't begin to wonder why I'm not doing them anymore.
@ Everyone: I am so humbled and blessed by your responses. Thank you so much. . . they have meant a lot to me. I can't even begin to adequately respond individually. What wonderful responses! Thank you.
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